Order in the house

The last few months have been rather interesting living. It is almost as though I have been living without rules - no need to wake up at a set time; random naps during the day; playing games all day long; staying out till late. Unfortunately, coupled with a person like me who lacks discipline and likes to take things to extreme, this has led to a lifestyle of sports, playing games till 4am in the morning, surfing the Net and resting in between (supplemented with my customary afternoon nap).

If everyone did what they wanted without any regard for others, the world would be utter chaos and shambles. However, whereever I look, there seems to be some form of order which exists . Many of us seek order and certainty - or feel lost without it. From the way that roads are built (ok, maybe except for the roadworks around the Lane Cove tunnel), the buildings that are around, to the way people interact at work Companies and projects are like large magnets which align all their staff, pointing them in a particular direction in order to meet the objectives. Furthermore, there is something much more physically appeasing in a clean and orderly room, than a messy one.

However, I realised that this lifestyle is entirely unstructured - and I am "winging it" with no real aim or end goal. I have no concrete objectives over this period of time which has been leading down a spiral of pure indulgence. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but perhaps deep down, I watch the world go by and sense that everything is progressing but I seem to have stood still. Yet as much as I would love to treasure this moment, I know that it cannot last forever. Cliched, but true - blame my poor vocabulary.

Maybe I am more left brained than others, but in a way, I think rules are a good thing as it keeps things orderly and injects certainty. It helps instill discipline in those without (e.g. me). Waking up at noon is great, but I just realised that I did nothing for the entire morning.

Having no objectives and no goals has been great and lots of fun, but having a loose framework of objectives is starting to make me feel rather edgy as it is not something I know I can do for long. Maybe I am not looking forward to retirement after all and that I feel I need to be active or doing something all the time. I guess I should just enjoy it while it lasts, eh?

In any case, in order to help me get over this, I will start to write a list of all the things I want to do, before I finish my six months of leave (ok - I have already used up 2 of those months). Hopefully, I can tick off each of those as little objectives I want to achieve. Now I just need to motivate myself to actually think about and write those objectives down!